눈을 감고 있었어 / Closed Eyes

I stand on the edge of a cliff

혼자서 그를 기다리면서

언제 부터 이렇게 약해졌을까 생각할때

I see the sun set

pulling me into the darkness

making me realize that when onwards was never important

자신의 감정을 정리 못하고 볼수록 비참해진 내 모습

돌 처럼 강력했던 나의 깜짝스러운 이런 모습

사람을 믿기 두려워했던 이 바보가 이제 누군가 에게 기대하고 싶음

자신의 뚜껑을 열리고 싶음

내 목소리 들어줘라고 호의를 부탁하고 싶음

행복 하는 거 행복하지 않는 거라고

웃는 거 웃지 않는 거라고

울고 싶다 는 건 말을 못하고 촉촉해진 내 눈

빗물 땅에 떨어지는 것처럼

계속 볼에 내려 앉은 눈물

돌아보면 사라진 눈물

시간 흐르고 있도록 내 머리속에 소나기 억수 가 돼

나 만 남은 이곳에

시간이 멈춘 것처럼 I keep getting drenched

하지만 내 귀에 심장 박동이 울려

오직 그것만 들려

폭풍우가 강해져

맑해지지않은 하늘 동굴 꼭대기로 보여

내 싸움을 지켜볼 별도 없이

한 없이 혼자 서있어

깨달았어

내가 스스로 나를 이 도굴에 잠겼다라는 사실

사람을 믿기 두려워했던 이 바보가 이제 누군가에게 기대하고 싶음

내 목소리 들어줘라고 호의 하고 싶음

행복하는 거 행복하지 않는 거라고

웃는 거 웃지 않는 거라고

울고 싶다는건 말을 못하고 촉촉해진 내 눈

빗물 땅에 떨어지는 것처럼

계속 볼에 내려 앉은 눈물

돌아보면 사라진 눈물

너무 놀란스럽다

That I am so different from who I was

사람이 이렇게 변할줄 모르고

내가 나를 직접 절벽의 가장자리까지 대려왔다

뛰어 내릴수 없이 계속 위해만 보고있는

나를 보면서 마음속에 보충한다

사람이 바꿀 수 없다 는 게

그저 좋아질수 만 있다는건

깨달았어

내가 한번도 변한적 없는지

그래도 계속 절벽에 서있어

탈출 하지 못해

I force myself to face myself

I force myself to win myself

억지로 하고 있지만 내 자신을 해방 할 수 있길 바라며

I face myself

                                                             

This song expresses the storm that is going on in the mind of a depressed person. How helpless he feels and how desperately he needs a person to lean on. All these years he thought of himself to be as strong as a rock. But now that he is in this stage he mistakes himself that he has changed. He understands himself through this ordeal. He understands that it was he himself that brought him to this cliff and locked himself in this cave. When the sudden shower in his head turns into a downpour he slowly understands the importance of freeing himself and letting his tears fall. This realisation helps him to courageously face himself. The song ends on the note that protagonist is on the journey to face himself. It focuses on how downs are just the part of the process of reaching up.

                                                

Translation

Closed Eyes

I stand on the edge of a cliff,

Waiting for someone all alone

Wondering when I got so weak like this.

I see the sun set,

Pulling me into darkness

Making me realize that “when” was never important.

Not being able to hold a handle over my emotions,

I grow pitiful

Making me wonder,

“When did someone as strong as a rock

Grow so weak like this?”

 

A fool like me, afraid to trust

Wants to lean on someone

Wants to bare myself to someone

Wants just someone to hear me.

I want to shout to the world

That me acting like I’m happy

Me smiling,

It’s all an act

An act that’s not even good enough

To convince anyone anymore.

Brimming with words,

Not able to say that I want to cry,

My eyes get wet.

Tears weighing on my eyes slide them close,

Shutting the world out.

Like raindrops splattering on the ground,

Tears, finally, roll onto my cheeks and splatter down,

Disappearing when I look back.

 

As time passes, the light shower in my head

Turns into a downpour,

Drenching only me,

As if time stopped

And I’m the only one left in this world.

But all I hear is my heartbeat

Ringing in my ears.

 

Like the top of a cave,

The pitch dark sky

Keeps staring at me

With not even a star to blink at me.

I stand there all alone

With no sense of time,

Slowly realizing that I’m the one

Who locked myself in this cave.

 

A fool like me, afraid to trust

Wants to lean on someone

Wants to bare myself to someone

Wants just someone to hear me.

Brimming with words,

Not able to say that I want to cry,

My eyes get wet.

Tears weighing on my eyes slide them close,

Shutting the world out.

Like raindrops splattering on the ground,

Tears, finally, roll onto my cheeks and splatter down,

Disappearing when I look back.

 

It’s so surprising

That I’m so different from who I was.

Without even knowing that I could change so much,

I brought myself to this cliff.

Staring blankly while a storm was brewing in my head,

I force myself to face myself

I force myself to win myself.

Clinging to the thin thread of hope,

I face myself.